Staring at this will be helpful. Really.

I haven’t posted in a little while, and there are a couple of reasons for that.  One is that I’ve been running myself absolutely ragged lately with my regular job.  My deadlines caught up with me in the worst way, I had no childcare, and I had no time for anything.  As a result, I gained weight.

This isn’t supposed to be a “weight loss” blog.  I’m supposed to be on here talking about getting back to “healthy,” whatever that means for me now.  That doesn’t necessarily mean I’m going to be svelte, and I have to accept that.

I can tell myself all of those things, but nothing quite drives away that shame when I see the numbers inching up on the scale.

I know what happened.  It’s not hard to figure out.  I sacrificed sleep to meet my deadlines.  I spent a whole week going to bed at 4:30 in the morning, and getting up at 7:30.  I know my body.  I know my history.  Every time I’ve gained weight, it’s been when my sleep has been disrupted.

And it’s very easy for me to sit here and say, “Okay, well, I’ll just make sure my sleep doesn’t get disrupted then.”  Some things are under my control.  Sometimes we have to make choices in life.  When it comes down to losing our job or losing some sleep, we tend to choose to put sleep off.  We can always make that up later, right?

Being so busy also had an effect on my diet.  That didn’t have as much of an effect as you might think, but it certainly didn’t help.  What dining out, and choosing faster and more convenient options, did do was make me feel awful the whole time.

For those of you who were curious about that aloe water remedy, I lost track and forgot to make the stuff while I was on my sleep-deprived bender.  I’ll get back on track this week.  I’m sure you’re all shocked that it hasn’t helped so far, though!

So.  What can I do to try to make sure that doesn’t happen in the future?  (I’m not here just to bewail my ever-expanding waistline.  I do have an action plan, believe it or not.)

• Set better boundaries for work and home life, so I can avoid sleep deprivation for the next book and the next deadline.
• Use better discipline so that I don’t have to scramble at the last minute to meet my deadlines.
• Prepare dishes ahead of time so that healthier foods are equally as convenient as trashy foods.
• Make more time for rest.  This seems counterintuitive, but I get more work done more efficiently when I’m better rested.
• Get better hydrated.
• Find more time to exercise.  I focus better when I’ve moved my body.